Is early pregnancy rage causing you to question everything you thought you knew about prenatal bliss? Most expectant mothers know to expect mood swings. Those clichés about needing a box of tissues just to get through sentimental television commercials are true for many. However, pregnant women are less prepared for wild, unbridled anger that seems to bubble up out of nowhere.
Anger isn’t an emotion to feel shame over. However, sustained anger that isn’t addressed can cause stress for the mother and baby. In this post, we address the hard truths about pregnancy rage and some tools to calm the storm.
Pregnancy Rage Is Real: Here Are the Signs
Irritability
Irritability and the sense that your tolerance of others is on a hairpin trigger are the two most common signs of pregnancy rage. You feel “set off” by your partner and other people around you. When things don’t go your way, anger can boil to the surface at a pace that shocks you. You may also be having outbursts that are directed at loved ones. For example, shouting at your husband because the sink is full of dishes. However, you still struggle to control your angry reaction the next time you’re triggered. Have you ever found yourself in the midst of a blind, shaking rage? This is a sign you’re deep in the trenches of pregnancy rage.
Feeling Extremely Overwhelmed
There’s also an underlying feeling of being overwhelmed. It can feel like the world, your life, and people around you are asking too much of you. Your tolerance and patience are nonexistent. Your fear and vulnerability make you want to lash out. When you rage at others, you often feel remorseful and ashamed after the fact.
Causes of Early Pregnancy Rage
Nobody can fault you for expressing extreme emotional ups and downs during pregnancy. However, there is a difference between expected emotional changes and rage that is impacting your health and quality of life. Here are some underlying causes of pregnancy rage to consider.
Hormones
The human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG), progesterone, and estrogen released during pregnancy to help your baby grow also dramatically impact mood. All are linked with increases in mood swings, intense emotions, and irritability. Some women may experience rage because they are more sensitive to a specific hormone.
Physical Discomfort
Aches, pains, tenderness, and soreness during pregnancy could be making you feel angry. Anger is actually considered a normal response to pain. A 2022 study finds that physical pain may lead to aggressive behavior in a social context. Could that explain why you’re suddenly lashing out at people?
It’s possible that persistent pain and discomfort have weakened your restraint. Of course, trying to suppress or deny pain could actually increase anger. Make sure you’re connecting with your body using physical therapy, massage, or other pregnancy-safe treatments if you think physical discomfort could be inflaming your mood.
Stress
Your life is about to change in the biggest way possible. Unaddressed anxiety and stress during pregnancy can manifest as anger. If you’re preparing for a baby, you may feel like you’re constantly rushing against the clock to get everything set. You may also be worried about how your life will change, pregnancy complications, and the birthing experience. Pregnancy rage can also be a form of pregnancy depression. Perinatal depression impacts between 10% and 20% of women.
Sleep Deprivation
Are you tossing and turning at night due to sore hips, swelling, night sweats, or unexplained wakefulness? Nobody is in a good mood after a poor night of sleep. Weeks or months of bad sleep can turn any of us into rage monsters. According to a 2024 study looking at sleep and sleep disorders during pregnancy and postpartum, poor quality of sleep was reported by 34% of women in the first trimester and 46% of women in the third trimester.
Try a sleep tracker to get a read on how much sleep you’re actually getting each night. If your sleeping hours have dipped substantially since becoming pregnant, talk to your doctor about pregnancy-safe solutions.
How To Calm Pregnancy Rage
Focusing on self-care can help you calm pregnancy rage. These things can help you feel better:
- Perinatal yoga – Perinatal yoga can help you manage the emotional challenges of pregnancy by promoting relaxation. It can also provide a sense of calm and community (if you do a group class).
- Light exercise – Swimming, walking, and other pregnancy-safe activities can help you feel better emotionally and physically. Exercise releases endorphins, which can lift your mood.
- Meditation – Meditation reduces stress hormones, which can lower feelings of anger and rage. It enables you to focus on the positives and helps you relax.
- Journaling – Journaling your thoughts and feelings can free you from rage. Try these prompts: “What are you angry about?” ‘What helps when you are angry?” “What makes anger worse?”
Don’t Keep Quiet About Your Feelings During Pregnancy: Seek Help for Pregnancy Rage
If you’re experiencing anger or depression during pregnancy, it’s important to share your feelings with people around you. You should also consider therapy to learn tools to address emotions that are causing you to feel out of control. Pregnancy is a time when many old feelings can bubble up to the surface.
At Bloom Therapy, we offer in-person and virtual therapy for trauma, grief, and other common factors that can contribute to pregnancy rage. Our eclectic therapeutic approaches include EMDR, Art Therapy, Brainspotting, and traditional talk therapy. Reach out for a free consultation to learn more!